Monday, July 26, 2004
finally managing to write an entry today.. have been busy.. oh so so busy with pw and shit.. compiling everything up and gathering everyones research.. well i do hope it would pay off .. im sure i did put in alot of effort this time.. MOE better be grateful i actually bothered to choose the most tightest days to do my project..
have been going jurong library for 2 days in a row.. sat and sunday.. friday was online looking for internet articles.. phew
but i dunno whether i should feel relieved that my group has passed up the file
the kind of feeling now equals the anxiety and stress i felt before submitting it in to sas
but sas did manage to talk to me awhile.. he did mention our files were of high quality .. of course la! looking at the other groups in our school.. i can see that they really didnt bother about pw very much. their file thickness to ours would be like comparing a lorry with a pickup..
ive been feeling down lately this past few days.. im sure why.
sure.
such primal feelings are generally inevitable..
the human is engineered to interact with such irritating emotions
we cant escape the fact that we are made what we are and how the people around us react.
maybe i was wrong in saying never giving up..
sometimes when you are in ur own shoes u can give all the moral encouragement in the whole big fat milky way
but when ur in the troubled dirtied shoes.
u see things differently
why bother even trying when u noe u are already on the floor...
im afraid of past reoccurences..
im afraid of spies.
im afraid of my own bewildered imagaination.. meeting up failing expectations..
im so very happy.. but thats okay.. because so are u.
happiness started out nice. but joy needs the paint of depression..
im afraid of losing you away like i once did..
my articulation my courage my pillars shattered... what if it happens again? what if it happens again?
